Many of the leaders I speak with each week (clients, prospective clients, friends) are navigating job loss or deep career uncertainty. They don’t just feel lost professionally. They’re starting to question who they are, what they bring to the table, and whether they’ll ever feel confident again.
These are people with impressive resumes, powerful track records, and strong reputations. And still, they’re stuck in cycles that feel impossible to make sense of…
“Everyone says my resume is great—so why can’t I get hired?”
“People I thought were my friends aren’t stepping up for me.”
“I keep making it to the final round, only to hear ‘you’re not the right fit.’”
“Someone just like me got the role I was rejected from.”
“I’m being told the role is gone, but then I see it reposted.”
“I’m scared. I’m tired. I don’t know how much longer I can keep going like this.”
It’s not just the rejection—it’s the silence. The people who said they’d help… disappearing. The industry you once knew… suddenly unrecognizable.
Every one of these thoughts is completely valid and not unique to one person, which is why I opted to write this post. When you’re in the middle of that kind of stress and disappointment, it feels personal. It feels like everything is bad. Like something must be broken in you or the world around you. “Tell me what I’m doing wrong, Teresa. Tell me how to fix it.”
Have you ever heard the parable about the farmer and his horse?
I know, this might not seem like the time for parables. Stay with me!
It’s not a feel-good story. It’s a mindset tool. One that has helped many of my clients interrupt that downward spiral and step back into clarity.
A farmer’s prize horse wins a local contest. His neighbors congratulate him. “How lucky you are!”
“Who knows what is good or bad?” the farmer calmly replies.
Days later, the horse is stolen. The neighbors come with sympathy. Again, “Who knows what is good or bad?”
The horse returns. This time with several beautiful mares. More congratulations. Same calm, “Who is to know what is good or bad?” response.
Then, the farmer’s son breaks his leg taming one of the new horses. “How terrible,” the neighbors say. Again, the farmer, “Who knows what is good or bad?”
Soon after, the army arrives, recruiting all able-bodied young men for war. The farmer’s son is spared because of the injury.
The story keeps unfolding. The neighbors eventually stop labeling each moment as good or bad. They simply show up with a meal.
If this story doesn’t sit well with you right now… you’re not alone.
When I first share it with clients – especially those who are burned out, laid off, or questioning their next move – many are confused or even irritated by it. I hear things like:
- “It’s repetitive.”
- “It oversimplifies real pain.”
- “It doesn’t apply to what I’m going through.”
Yet, something interesting happens over time.
As we work together – building new habits, practicing reflection, slowing the spiral – that same story starts to land differently. What once sounded vague becomes deeply personal. What once felt dismissive becomes empowering. It’s not instant. It’s not easy. Yet as they build the muscle of reflection and mental fitness, something softens. Then something opens.
That’s the real shift.
Not just understanding the story—but realizing it reflects a new way of leading through uncertainty.
What the farmer can teach us about rejection and redirection
That voice in your head – the one saying, “This is bad. I’ve failed. Something is wrong.” – isn’t trying to sabotage you. It’s trying to protect you. It’s scanning for danger, demanding certainty, searching for something to fix.
Yet what if, even for a breath, you didn’t accept that voice as the full truth?
What if you responded to the silence, the rejections, the reshuffling job descriptions – not with judgment, yet with:
“Who knows what is good or bad?”
That pause isn’t about pretending you’re fine. It’s about interrupting the spiral. And in that pause, something powerful can happen:
- An opportunity that wasn’t visible before the “no.”
- A relationship that leads you somewhere new.
- A shift in identity that opens the door to a more sustainable and joyful career.
For many of my clients, that one sentence becomes a practice. A way to get unstuck. A way to stop spiraling and start leading… again.
If you’re in that space right now
You may be questioning everything right now… your timing, your value, even your direction.
That doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve lost your ability to be successful.
It might simply mean you’re being invited to see success through a different lens.
What might shift if you paused… and asked yourself:
“Who knows what is good or bad?”
What could become possible from there?
Not as an answer, but as a practice.
A way of returning to what matters most, even in the midst of uncertainty.